Ruin is a Gift

Just a couple of things to talk about on my mind.

One: The words "uh-oh" or "oops" in a hair salon. When a woman walks in to a hair salon, the last thing in any language she wants to hear is either "uh-oh" or "oops." At work, no biggie. In the kitchen at home, no biggie. Art project, no biggie. You're getting the idea. But I'll tell you what, you get the row of mirrors with a woman in front of each; either with scissors currently being held up with hair in them, or head full of foil. Then you place a hairdresser somewhere in the midst and have them say "oops," and every single back is going to straighten and all eyes will widen. On a similar note, I still can't get used to my hair. In fact, when I saw a picture of my boyfriend and I together with this hair, I was saddened. Everyone else loves it. I sadly, do not. I hope that adding more blonde to it will help me like it more.

Two: I currently have two musical instruments in my room, and can I just say: Music, I have missed you. And I am so glad to have you re-entering my life.

Three: There are so many things I want to commit to, without any idea how to do it. Take time on my yoga mat every day. Play music in free time instead of just stuffing my face. Save money- stop going out for lunch when I have soup in my kitchen. Quit smoking. Sometime, hopefully soon, I will find the will power to do all of these things.

Four: Seriously anyone who has not yet read Eat Pray Love needs to get on it. I realize that not everyone will have the same reaction to it that I did. As basically the book is becoming much like a bible to me, and now that I own the movie, it literally speaks to my soul. But in all seriousness, it gives some magnificent new views. How to really enjoy life. How to let go and cry. How to love yourself. To be free of guilt and pain. Here's a quote from it for you to sit on.

"I realized that maybe my own life hasnt been so chaotic. It's just the world that is, and the only real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation."

Five: Every day I open myself up to love more and more. And you know what? I really believe that it is making a difference in the quality of my life. And it will pay off. Everything that is meant to happen will.

And that is where I leave off tonight.

Goodnight.
With love.